Jane Jago’s Daily Drabble – Three Hundred and Sixty-Three

Mattie cradled her youngest grandchild and looked at his mother over the babe’s downy head.

“Art going to tell me?” she asked gently.

Her daughter pleated the sprigged cotton of her skirt with nervous fingers.

“Thoui’t think me a fool.”

“Try me.”

“Mam. When did anyone last call thee by thy given name?”

“Long before thy birth, my love.”

“Once we married your da called me Wife. Then when Will was born, I became Mother.”

“It ain’t right, Mam.”

Mattie put her hand over Elizabeth’s.

“It’s the price we pay, love, for healthy babies.”

“Aye Mam. I reckon it is.”

©jj 2019

The Lighthouse

They built him on the hillside, facing out to sea
His eyes glowed red to light the route
To harbour’s calm safety
In his hand he held a blade, upraised to serve and save
A beacon, hero, brought  them home
The honest and the brave
He served the fishers and the folk, who gave him not a name
And ten times ten the winters passed 
Until his sword took flame
Until he walked the naked land, until he took his due
The metal man who lit them home
Sent them to Hades too

©jj 2019

Weekend Wind Down – One Week

A short fiction by Jane Jago. You can listen in to this on YouTube.

One week…
At the time it hadn’t seemed like too much to barter with the little man with the domed skull who had offered a solution to her predicament. At first he had asked for her virginity as a downpayment, but when she laughed and pointed out that it was a rose that had been plucked a good while since he had pushed out his long upper lip and made an old-maidish tisking noise. But then he had brightened. His master, he said, would be content with a week of her company in recompense for helping her out. At a time convenient to her, of course. 
She had agreed hastily, frankly in so much fear of the consequences of her actions that she would have agreed to anything he suggested. Now, however, with the threat of prison no longer hanging over her head, she would have dearly loved to wriggle out of the deal, but there seemed to be no escape. 
It was, therefore, with a fairly bad grace that she boarded the Eurostar for Brussels on a freezing cold Sunday afternoon in the pouring rain.
“Belgium…” she mused inwardly, “who lives in Belgium?”
That was a question that she was never to have answered. A pressed and barbered chauffeur, carrying a huge umbrella, met her on the station concourse and escorted her to a waiting limousine. He tenderly helped her into the rear of the vehicle.
“Our journey will be of about four hours duration, madam.”
She nodded as regally as she could, whilst mentally trying to pin down his middle European accent. 
He got into the driver’s seat and the vehicle moved away as smoothly as if it ran on ball bearings. The sound of the doors locking was almost shockingly loud. She reminded herself that her own more modest saloon car performed precisely the same function when the speed reached ten miles per hour, but that was of very little comfort as she looked at the chauffeur’s shaven neck and the way his cap was placed precisely centrally on his almost square head. Not normally a woman noted for her imagination, she gave herself a mental shake, but couldn’t rid herself of a small worm of dread lurking deep in the pit of her stomach. 
The journey seemed endless and she was only able to endure it with to
tolerable equanimity by concentrating on her own breathing and looking out of the window at the sheets of rain. As the day grew darker, the rain grew increasingly sleety and by the time they turned off the autobahn onto what was obviously a private drive it was snowing in earnest. The woman examined her own perfectly manicured fingernails and wondered just what she had allowed herself to be manoeuvred into. Pushing half a million dollars worth of assistance out of a sticky situation to the back of her mind, she allowed herself to feel misused.
The big car swished to a halt beside a set of ironwork gates. Her driver rolled down his window and said something she didn’t catch. The gates slid open and the car picked up speed again. Only now they were driving through a rocky tunnel. She shivered involuntarily. The tunnel was dark and it seemed that the headlights barely pierced the gloom. 
“Almost there madam.”
That wasn’t exactly reassuring either.
Not being a fanciful woman, she wasn’t sure why her heart dropped to somewhere in the region of the needle-sharp heels of her boots when the car stopped outside the deeply carved, black walls of an ornate castle. Walls that were being rapidly decorated with white snow frosting. Somewhere in the very back of her mind she heard the words ‘Castle of Otranto’ and some long-forgotten fear grasped her by the throat. At that moment, had there been anywhere to run she would have fled. But there wasn’t. Instead she set her foot on the bottom step and mounted the worn stone steps, bending her mind to grace and suppleness grace in place of gaucherie and fear. 
As she reached the huge doors one leaf was thrown open and a cadaverous figure in the dark suit of a butler stood regarding her. She was a woman well accustomed to servants, so she glided past paying him no more heed than if he had been one of the gargoyles that glowered down on her from the dark stone walls.
Inside the place a huge fire burned in the sort of grate that could have accommodated a whole tree. A servant bustled forward and took her coat. She automatically fluffed her hair and touched fingers to her perfectly painted lips before turning to face the figure that uncurled itself from a huge chair beside that crackling fire. For an instant she saw, or thought she saw, grey scaly skin, yellowish teeth, and long bright claws on strangely articulated fingers. But then the image wavered and all she could really begin to focus on was icy green eyes with vertical slotted pupils. She thought she might have been about to faint, but she was not granted even that small mercy. However, she had never lacked courage and walked to meet her fate with a straight spine and a cool smile. 

One week…

One week can be a lifetime or as fleeting as a passing breath. 
From that day until the end of a pampered and hugely successful life she could never decide which she experienced. All she knew for certain was that whatever happened to her in those seven days she must have pleased Him greatly to be allowed to leave on her own two feet.

Jane Jago

Jane Jago’s Daily Drabble – Three Hundred and Sixty-Two

Knut looked at the gesticulating man with some hauteur. He was sitting on his own doorstep, and minding his own business, and, as far as he was concerned, the human needed to mind his business.

Missus came to the door, laughing, she bent to run her fingers through his ruff. 

“D’you think the big man’s afraid of you?”

Knut let his tongue loll and thumped his tail.

In the end the man went away, and when Mister came home he was lavish in his praise.

“You protected well.”

Knut stuck out his chest. He loved Missus, and he was proud.

©jj 2019

The Soldier’s Lot

Once I stood upon the battlefield,
My sword held high
And in the righteous cause, my blade did wield
And I did die.

Once on horse so fine I rode to war
My king to serve
With pistol and carbine, I slew a score
And fell to earth.

Once in trenches deep I crawled all day
My land to save
With machine-gun fire I cleared the way
And found my grave.

Now I watch a screen and with my hand
It’s drones I fly
Their deadly strikes will kill at my command
But I won’t die.

E.M. Swift-Hook

Picture by from Ian Bristow of Bristow Design

 

Moonbeam Farquhar Metheringham IV reviews ‘A Wizard of Earthsea’ by Ursula Kroeber Le Guin

You can listen to this on YouTube.

There are some books one remembers distinctly from childhood because of the immense impact they had at the time on the developing individual. I have memories of A Wizard of Earthsea bound up in blood and trauma.

I was gifted the tome by some long forgotten maiden aunt of my pater’s who had included a hand scripted note saying how she thought the cover looked like it was ‘a good book for a little boy’. I should probably add that said maiden great-aunt was profoundly immersed in art deco, dadaism and surrealism. Left to myself I would not have opened the thing and would have slipped it into the bag of items Mumsie always kept for The Less Fortunate and shipped out to a charity shop once full.

But Pater had other plans. It seemed I was required not only to write a loquacious and sycophantic thank you letter to said maiden great-aunt, it was also required that I first read the wretched thing and pass comment upon how profoundly it had moved my innocent young soul. In other words, a review.

From the wisdom and experience of adulthood, I can look back fondly on my child-self and laugh at my puerile folly in thinking this was some show of esteem and affection for his aunt from my father. As I recall the inheritance netted him enough to double his investments overnight.

I still have the review, which I wrote with a cartridge pen on the back page of the book and in the process inflicted a paper-cut on my innocent childish fingers. My first ever.

The Review.

A boy called Dunny, or Sparrowhawk or Ged is good at magic and goes to a kind of Hogwarts on an island. There he learns magic and gets in a fight with the school bully. He loses his shadow and he and his best friend have to find it again. 

It was a very annoying book because the boy could have won by using the magic stone but for some reason decided not to.

Stars: One and a half. 

Moonbeam Farquhar Metheringham IV

You can find more of IVy’s profound thoughts in How To Start Writing A Book courtesy of E.M. Swift-Hook and Jane Jago.

Jane Jago’s Daily Drabble – Three Hundred and Sixty-One

He bought the picture at a house clearance sale. 

Anna obediently cleaned the dim little oil, which turned out to be a charming study of Bacchus and his nymphs.

She loved it. And Him.

The marriage lurched along for another decade, but when it finally broke He was vicious. Within a week Anna was out and he had installed his young mistress.

She was a fey creature who sat in front of the painting devouring it with her eyes.

Then she disappeared.

Did she run away?

Did He kill her?

Or was there an extra figure in the painted bacchanal?

©jj 2019

Coffee Break Read – Greeting A Dragon

This is an extract from ‘Dragonheart’ one of the adult fairy tales in The Dragonheart Stories by Jane Jago. You can listen to this on YouTube.

The dragon spiralled down out of the sunset, with the orange light setting his skin aflame so that he looked as if he was made of oil and steel. Tia stood and watched, wryly noting the Diamond Throne banner, whilst being careful not to move or speak until the shining one’s feet touched the ground and he furled his wings.

She bowed her head in a formal gesture of welcome.
“Greetings lady,” the voice inside her head was deeper than she expected. This must be a full male, which meant he would be a shifter as well. He would bear watching. Carefully.
“Greetings, bright one.”
The dragon regarded her out of whirling multi-faceted eyes before bowing his head. The silence lengthened, and seemed to Tia that her uninvited guest was trying to make her nervous with his lack of comment. She broke the silence in a deliberately small voice.
“What does my lady mother want of me?”
“Naught. She would merely ascertain that you are well.”
Tia cast down her eyes so he could not see her contempt.
“Perhaps my lord dragon would care to assume his human form and venture inside, to where we can speak in more comfort.”
If it was possible for a dragon to look puzzled, he did so.
“May one ask what makes you think this dragon has a human form?”
For a moment Tia dropped her shield of humility.
“Who am I?” she raised a narrow dark eyebrow.
He thought about that one for a moment before dipping his head.
“One is ashamed.”
Tia was at great pains not to show her contempt for that remark.
“I apologise. It was not my intention to cause you disquiet.”
She felt the dragonish laughter as a vibration that ran right through her skeleton.
“My name is M’a’tsu, and I would be honoured to visit with you.”
Tia curtseyed.
“I will leave you to make the change in privacy.”
She turned and made her way across the flower strewn meadow to the grey stone buildings that clustered at the base of the cliffs and the stone stairway to the temple.

M’a’tsu watched her go, enjoying her long-legged stride and the way her body moved under the simple linen robe she wore. He found himself fantasising about tying her up with the rope of her own black hair, which hung in a braid almost to her knees. Giving himself a sharp inward reminder that he wasn’t there for pleasure, he took the necessary time to compose his mind before making the change.

Once he was in his human form, he stretched for a moment enjoying the different sensations afforded by thinner skin. He looked down at his muscular perfection and briefly considered remaining unclothed but the pleasure of the rapidly cooling air against his human flesh had to be balanced against the possibility of giving offence. Accordingly he shifted himself leather trews and a waistcoat, electing to remain barefoot for the sheer delight of the feel of grass beneath him.

Jane Jago.

Jane Jago’s Daily Drabble – Three Hundred and Sixty

He broke her heart when she was seventeen, and crowed about it in the pub until her brother broke his nose.

Ten years later he sent her a Facebook friend request. She ignored him, so he posted ten-year-old pictures of her naked body alongside a pretty crude dismissal of her performance in bed.

But he was a fool, because she unearthed the poem she wrote the day after he left her. It went viral, as every teenage girl in the world downloaded a copy for her bedroom wall.

And him?

Oh, nobody noticed him, except as a deceiver.

©jj 2019

Mrs Jago’s Handy Guide to the Meaning Behind Typographical Errors: Part XV

…. or ‘How To Speak Typo’ by Jane Jago

buson (noun) – heavily armoured brassiere 

cadgiran (noun) – warm woolly, worn by unreliable gentleman

chils (noun) – small person with a perpetually runny nose

digsust (noun) – assistant gardener

ebhind (noun) – a person with a Bambi fixation

fiendr (noun) – false friend

giggkes (noun) – chuckles that end in hiccoughs

moom (noun) – elongated female parent

nomran (adjective) – of architecture, seldom perpendicular 

rokcet (noun) – salad leaf whose flavour is vaguely reminiscent of elderly  training shoes

sumb (noun) – a column of numbers that comes to a different total every time you add it up

sytaighforward (adverb) – of gait denoting having the chest poked forward and the ass cheeks pressed as far back as possible

tuhmb (noun) – the sound a cat makes just prior to vomiting

usueful (adverb) – of teaching not entirely successful but well-intentioned

waelse (noun) – the offspring of a marsupial and a garden chair

Disclaimer: all these words are genuine typos defined by Jane Jago. The source of each is withheld to protect the guilty.

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