Granny Knows Best – Euphemistic Adverts

What the heck is, ‘Itching Down There’?

Is it scratchy anus time?

Does it indicate something stirring in the lady garden (okay itchyfanny)?

If the advertiser of the cream known only by number means itchyfanny why don’t they bloody say so, not make me think the whole of Australia has impetigo.

And while I have your attention. What the fuck is ‘feminine leakage’? 

Is it menstrual fluid, or maybe urine? But it can be neither as it’s blue. (Hint: if you are leaking something blue seek medical aid. Now!)

And finally. 

Stop sending me Viagra adverts. I. Don’t. Need. It.

You can now have a collection of Granny’s inimitable insights of your very own in Granny Knows Best.