Mrs Jago’s Handy Guide to the Meaning Behind Typographical Errors. Part XXVII

…. or ‘How To Speak Typo’ by Jane Jago

athanema (noun) – wheezing breath caused by running uphill when fat and unfit 

broing (verb) – the act of shyly suggesting a homosexual relationship 

depsite (noun) – place where ill-gotten gains are secreted

diea (noun)  – slightly wobbly locomotion caused by the ingestion of alcohol

feredom (verb) – of novels, the act of returning to the wild

infalt (verb) – to suck in air in preparation for giving somebody a right ear bashing

motger (noun) – small antipodean rodent that can be found in the holes in cheese

neote (adverb) – of speech weirdly hesitant and with an apologetic air

perguler (noun) – person paid to lie in court

rogjt (noun) – very hot chilli only eaten by the foolish or men at chucking out time on a Saturday night (yeah, okay, the foolish)

trud (noun) – very hard poo

upseide (adjective) – having the colour and texture of earwax

vitgun (noun) – peashooter loaded with vitamin pills

wjat (noun) – another term for a thingamajig

xplid (adjective) – pale green and about to vomit

Disclaimer: all these words are genuine typos defined by Jane Jago. The source of each is withheld to protect the guilty.

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