Moonbeam Farquhar Metheringham IV reviews ‘On the Beach’ by Nevil Shute

One encountered this book back in one’s tender teens when it was a set text for some examination or another. One’s peer group was set the task of reading this dull tome and writing about its dystopian view of nuclear holocaust.

Being a child of extreme sensitivity one approached the story of the end of the world with some trepidation. But one need not have worried, sailing through this pages affected one with no more than brain-crippling boredom…

Review

This is a book in which nothing happens. Repeatedly. Nobody does anything much. Basically they all stooge around waiting to die. There is no romance, no sex, no adventure, nothing to stir the soul. Some people are in Australia waiting to die. In the end they do so.

Our teachers attempted to inculcate in us the belief that this was a case of masterly understatement. They failed. Even one’s contemporaries, whose hard-handed masculinity sent shivers of excitement and fear down one’s spine to one little pink toeses, apostrophed this as dull and uninteresting. Although one clearly remembers that it was not they who were bent over the headmaster’s skinny thighs and beaten for their opinions.

This book would be an excellent cure for insomnia.

Stars: Zero (one can still feel the cane across one’s tender flesh).

Moonbeam Farquhar Metheringham IV

You can find more of IVy’s profound thoughts in How To Start Writing A Book courtesy of E.M. Swift-Hook and Jane Jago.

4 thoughts on “Moonbeam Farquhar Metheringham IV reviews ‘On the Beach’ by Nevil Shute

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  1. Well, I’d certainly disagree. Perhaps you should read it again, as an adult. There is certainly so much going on in the lives of the characters that you seem to have dismissed. Each one is doomed, yes. It is how they each decide to face their doom–both the commonality and the individualistic nature of humanity–that is examined. What it means to be human, and mortal.

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