How To Speak Typo – Lesson 3

A dictionary for the bemused by Jane Jago…

Apble (noun) fruit that is a cross between an apple and an overripe banana

Blosh (adjective) a strangely washed out shade of pink commonly found in elderly ladies’ corsets

Crete (verb) to make something so slipshod that it falls over very quickly

Diffle coat (noun) an oversized coat (the sleeves of which usually brush the ground) bought by the mother of a seven-year-old on the theory that he/she will grow into it

Ho about (noun/adjective combo) indicative that a lady of dubious virtue is in the vicinity

Grubble (verb) to make strange moaning noises while asleep 

Interbalise (verb) to write absolute bollocks and think it literature

Sillock (noun) a blue fur ball commonly found in the navel

Snaggledoof (noun) a buck-toothed dog often found on instagram wearing unsuitable headgear

Sork (verb) to lick ones dinner plate with noisy enjoyment

Unack (verb) to be unable to cough up whatever is making your throat tickle

Wee-see (noun) the first successful use of the potty by a toddler

Wrek (noun) the corpse of a nerd killed by the snaggledoof for putting stupid hats on his head and posting pictures of same all across the Internet

Disclaimer: all these words are genuine typos defined by Jane Jago. The source of each is withheld to protect the guilty.